diff --git a/README.md b/README.md
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--- a/README.md
+++ b/README.md
@@ -11,3 +11,530 @@ cd && curl -L https://github.com/notwa/rc/archive/master.tar.gz | tar zx && mv r
 **NOTE:** everything below this line is overwritten and regenerated by `sh/document`.
 
 <!-- DOCUMENT -->
+
+## shell functions
+
+### [arith](/home/sh/arith#L9)
+
+perform arithmetic using the shell and display the result.
+
+### [aur](/home/sh/aur#L7)
+
+download, edit, make, and install packages from the
+[AUR.](https://aur.archlinux.org/)
+it's a little broken.
+
+### [autosync](/home/sh/autosync#L8)
+
+combine `inotifywait` and `rsync`.
+this is sometimes nicer than `ssh`-ing into a server and running `vim` remotely.
+
+### [cdbusiest](/home/sh/cdbusiest#L4)
+
+cd to the directory with the most files in it, counted recursively.
+
+### [colors](/home/sh/colors#L6)
+
+print out all the foreground and background terminal color combinations.
+excluding boilerplate, this script is a mere a 76-characters long!
+
+### [compandy](/home/sh/compandy#L5)
+
+generate compand arguments for ffmpeg audio filters.
+this is kinda pointless now that acompressor is wildly supported.
+
+### [__setup_clang_ubuntu (sh/compile)](/home/sh/compile#L7)
+
+
+### [compile](/home/sh/compile#L29)
+
+compile single-file C and C++ programs, messily.
+
+supports gcc and clang on \*nix, and mingw64 gcc, msvc clang,
+and regular msvc on Windows. tested on x86\_64 and on ARMv7 as well.
+does not support MacOS, maybe someday…
+
+defaults to gnu11 and gnu++1z as C and C++ standards respectively.
+defaults to clang, gcc, and msvc in that order.
+
+`compile` attempts to guess the most sane switches for any program, so that compilation may reduce to:
+
+**TODO:** restore examples.
+
+### [confirm](/home/sh/confirm#L6)
+
+display a simple yes-or-no prompt and return 0-or-1 respectively.
+
+```
+$ confirm && echo yay || echo nay
+Continue? [y/N] y
+yay
+$ confirm && echo yay || echo nay
+Continue? [y/N] n
+nay
+```
+
+### [days](/home/sh/days#L6)
+
+compute days since a given date.
+
+```
+$ days 'January 1 1970'
+18838
+```
+
+### [dbusiest](/home/sh/dbusiest#L6)
+
+display the directory with the most files in it, counted recursively.
+
+### [dfu](/home/sh/dfu#L6)
+
+pretty-print `df` in GiB.
+
+**TODO:** restore examples.
+
+### [disf](/home/sh/disf#L9)
+
+disassemble a single function from an unstripped executable, unreliably.
+
+### [e](/home/sh/e#L6)
+
+wrap around `$EDITOR` to run it as root if necessary.
+this still needs some work to detect root-owned directories.
+
+```
+$ e /etc/sudoers
+[sudo] password for notwa: 
+```
+
+### [has](/home/sh/has#L6)
+
+print the result of `which` if the program is found, else simply return 1.
+
+`export CC="$(has clang || has clang-3.8 || has gcc)"`
+
+### [hex](/home/sh/hex#L9)
+
+perform arithmetic using the shell and display the result as an unsigned 32-bit integer in hexadecimal.
+
+### [ify](/home/sh/ify#L6)
+
+pipe one command through another, so you can still pass arguments to the former.
+
+this is mainly useful for aliases. 99% of the time you'll use this with `less`.
+
+```
+$ alias ll="ify less ls -ACX --group-directories-first --color=force"
+$ ll /etc
+```
+
+### [is_empty](/home/sh/is_empty#L6)
+
+return 0 if the directory given by argument is empty.
+
+### [isup](/home/sh/isup#L8)
+
+return 0 if a given website returns a 2xx HTTP code.
+
+### [minutemaid](/home/sh/minutemaid#L6)
+
+return 0 if the current minute is divisible by a number.
+note that a minute is relative to the seconds since the epoch, not the minute of the hour.
+
+```
+# crontab usage:
+* * * * * minutemaid 9 ~/work/do_my_bidding # runs every nine minutes
+```
+
+### [monitor](/home/sh/monitor#L4)
+
+this is `watch` loosely reimplemented as a shell script.
+
+### [noccom](/home/sh/noccom#L10)
+
+strip C-like comments; both multi-line and single-line.
+
+### [now](/home/sh/now#L8)
+
+print a date-time (UTC) in a sortable format.
+this takes a date or file as an argument,
+else it defaults to the current time.
+```
+$ now
+2019-05-27_35083906
+$ now ~/sh/monitor
+2017-03-14_82387259
+$ now '@1234567890'
+2009-02-13_84690000
+```
+
+### [pacbm](/home/sh/pacbm#L6)
+
+list installed pacman packages by their filesize, and the sum, ascending. requires `expac`.
+
+```
+$ pacbm | head -n -1 | tail -2
+204.78M clang
+235.44M linux-firmware
+```
+
+### [pause](/home/sh/pause#L6)
+
+pause — the companion script of `confirm`.
+
+```
+$ pause
+Press any key to continue
+$ 
+```
+
+### [pre](/home/sh/pre#L6)
+
+dump all the `#define`s that `$CC $CPPFLAGS $CFLAGS $LDFLAGS` would result in.
+
+**TODO:** restore examples.
+
+### [randir](/home/sh/randir#L6)
+
+display a random directory in the current working directory.
+
+```
+$ randir
+./sh
+```
+
+### [rs](/home/sh/rs#L4)
+
+record screen. does not record audio.
+currently only works on Windows (gdigrab).
+i'm sure there's something equivalent for Linux.
+
+### [sc](/home/sh/sc#L40)
+
+upload given files to a webserver and return a direct link for sharing them.
+you'll want to tweak this if you use it yourself.
+this contains some extra logic for screenshots created by `scropt`.
+
+### [scramble](/home/sh/scramble#L6)
+
+scrambles text in a predictable way using regex.
+
+sacbremls ttex in a pdrceailtbe way unsig reegx.
+
+### [screeny](/home/sh/screeny#L4)
+
+i don't use this anymore~
+
+### [scropt](/home/sh/scropt#L8)
+
+run `scrot` through `optipng` and save the result to `~/play/$(now).png`.
+
+`$ ~/sh/sc $(~/sh/scropt -s -d0.5)`
+
+### [slit](/home/sh/slit#L6)
+
+view specific columns of text.
+
+### [slitt](/home/sh/slitt#L6)
+
+view specific columns of text.
+this version of `slit` uses tabs for its field separators.
+
+### [sram](/home/sh/sram#L4)
+
+convert between a couple saveram formats for N64 emulators.
+
+### [mpv_watch (sh/streamcrap)](/home/sh/streamcrap#L57)
+
+watch something in mpv with a bunch of extra audio filtering crap.
+
+### [mpv_stream (sh/streamcrap)](/home/sh/streamcrap#L69)
+
+watch a stream in mpv with a bunch of extra audio filtering crap.
+
+### [twitch (sh/streamcrap)](/home/sh/streamcrap#L82)
+
+watch a twitch stream in mpv with a bunch of extra audio filtering crap.
+
+### [yt (sh/streamcrap)](/home/sh/streamcrap#L88)
+
+watch a youtube video in mpv with a bunch of extra audio filtering crap.
+this can be given a full URL or just a video ID.
+remaining arguments are passed to mpv.
+
+there exist several variants for more specific use cases.
+
+### [ytg (sh/streamcrap)](/home/sh/streamcrap#L101)
+
+watch a youtube video. like `yt`, but with a preference for different formats.
+
+### [ytll (sh/streamcrap)](/home/sh/streamcrap#L107)
+
+watch a stream on youtube in mpv, etcetera etcetera.
+this is the low latency version that does not support seeking.
+
+### [ytgll (sh/streamcrap)](/home/sh/streamcrap#L113)
+
+watch a stream on youtube in mpv. like `ytll`, but with a preference for different formats.
+
+### [sv](/home/sh/sv#L6)
+
+collect the lastmost value of every key.
+the field separator can be given as its sole argument.
+
+```
+echo "this=that\nthem=those\nthis=cat" | sv =
+this=cat
+them=those
+```
+
+**TODO:** add multi-file grep example.
+
+### [tpad](/home/sh/tpad#L6)
+
+add a 1px transparent border around an image to prevent twitter from mangling it into a jpg.
+sadly, this trick doesn't work anymore.
+
+### [trunc](/home/sh/trunc#L6)
+
+truncate text to fit within your terminal using the unicode character `…`.
+
+### [unscreen](/home/sh/unscreen#L6)
+
+i don't use this anymore~
+
+### [wipe](/home/sh/wipe#L6)
+
+clear the screen and its scrollback, then print a high-contrast horizontal line.
+using this, you'll know with absolute certainty that you're looking at the top of your history,
+and that your terminal's scrollback didn't cap out and eat text.
+
+**TODO:** rename because wipe(1) already exists.
+
+## miscellaneous
+
+### [dirprev (zshrc)](/home/zshrc#L71)
+
+rotate and change to the previous directory in the directory stack
+without consuming the prompt.
+
+### [dirnext (zshrc)](/home/zshrc#L78)
+
+rotate and change to the next directory in the directory stack
+without consuming the prompt.
+
+### [dirup (zshrc)](/home/zshrc#L85)
+
+change to the parent directory of the current working directory
+without consuming the prompt.
+
+### [dirview (zshrc)](/home/zshrc#L92)
+
+use a fuzzy finder to select a recent directory in the directory stack
+and change to it without consuming the prompt.
+
+### [OMFG (zshrc)](/home/zshrc#L166)
+
+silence stdout.
+
+### [STFU (zshrc)](/home/zshrc#L167)
+
+silence stderr.
+
+### [WHOA (zshrc)](/home/zshrc#L168)
+
+expand to several C/C++ flags to ease development.
+
+### [WELP (zshrc)](/home/zshrc#L169)
+
+expand to C++ flags to enable a C++-as-C facade.
+
+### [pl (zshrc)](/home/zshrc#L173)
+
+print each argument on its own line.
+
+### [tw (zshrc)](/home/zshrc#L176)
+
+invoke `twitch` as a job with both stdout and stderr silenced.
+
+### [reload (zshrc)](/home/zshrc#L220)
+
+reload zsh by wiping temp files, recompiling rc files,
+and replacing the current process with a new zsh process.
+
+### [reload (bashrc)](/home/bashrc#L49)
+
+**TODO:** respect initctl like in `.zshrc`.
+
+### [has (-shrc)](/home/-shrc#L8)
+
+hardcoded here for convenience.
+
+### [ADDPATH (-shrc)](/home/-shrc#L24)
+
+append a directory to `$PATH` if it isn't already present.
+
+### [fils (-shrc)](/home/-shrc#L113)
+
+(GNU du) display human-friendly filesizes for the files in a directory.
+
+### [lsa (-shrc)](/home/-shrc#L114)
+
+(GNU ls) list files with directories and dotfiles ordered first.
+
+### [perlu (-shrc)](/home/-shrc#L115)
+
+invoke perl expecting files with UTF-8 encoding.
+
+### [rgn (-shrc)](/home/-shrc#L116)
+
+invoke ripgrep without respecting `.gitignore` files.
+
+### [cms (-shrc)](/home/-shrc#L117)
+
+invoke cryptominisat5 with less noise.
+
+### [curls (-shrc)](/home/-shrc#L118)
+
+invoke curl with less noise.
+
+### [get (-shrc)](/home/-shrc#L122)
+
+retrieve the most recent files from the default branch of a git repository, and not much else.
+
+### [gs (-shrc)](/home/-shrc#L123)
+
+invoke git's status subcommand.
+
+### [gd (-shrc)](/home/-shrc#L124)
+
+invoke git's diff subcommand with fewer lines of context.
+
+### [gds (-shrc)](/home/-shrc#L125)
+
+display difference stats from git.
+
+### [gl (-shrc)](/home/-shrc#L126)
+
+invoke git's log subcommand with a single line per commit.
+
+### [glo (-shrc)](/home/-shrc#L127)
+
+navigate git's commit tree succinctly.
+
+### [g1 (-shrc)](/home/-shrc#L128)
+
+display the most recent git commit.
+
+### [gr (-shrc)](/home/-shrc#L129)
+
+display remote git repositories verbosely.
+
+### [gb (-shrc)](/home/-shrc#L130)
+
+display the current git branch.
+
+### [revend (-shrc)](/home/-shrc#L136)
+
+reverse the 4-byte endianness of a single file. *this is an in-place operation!*
+
+### [clone (-shrc)](/home/-shrc#L138)
+
+invoke rsync suitably for creating virtually indistinguishable copies of files.
+
+### [aligntabs (-shrc)](/home/-shrc#L139)
+
+align tab-delimited fields in stdin.
+
+### [crawla (-shrc)](/home/-shrc#L140)
+
+play Dungeon Crawl: Stone Soup through ssh on the akrasiac server.
+
+### [crawlz (-shrc)](/home/-shrc#L141)
+
+play Dungeon Crawl: Stone Soup through ssh on the develz server.
+
+### [ll (-shrc)](/home/-shrc#L144)
+
+list files verbosely, fancily, ordered, but not recursively.
+
+### [diff (-shrc)](/home/-shrc#L152)
+
+use git's diff subcommand for general diffing.
+
+### [gc (-shrc)](/home/-shrc#L153)
+
+columnize text by using git's column subcommand.
+
+### [counts (-shrc)](/home/-shrc#L154)
+
+count files in the current directory, including files found recursively.
+
+### [exts (-shrc)](/home/-shrc#L155)
+
+count and sort file extensions in the current directory, including files found recursively.
+
+### [nocom (-shrc)](/home/-shrc#L156)
+
+strip single-line C-like and shell-like comments.
+
+### [sortip (-shrc)](/home/-shrc#L157)
+
+sort numerically by IPv4 segments.
+
+### [jrep (-shrc)](/home/-shrc#L158)
+
+extract strings comprised of basic ASCII or Japanese codepoints.
+
+### [bomb (-shrc)](/home/-shrc#L159)
+
+add a Byte-Order Mark to a file.
+
+### [cleanse (-shrc)](/home/-shrc#L160)
+
+strip unprintable and non-ASCII characters.
+
+### [rot13 (-shrc)](/home/-shrc#L161)
+
+rot13 with numbers rotated as well.
+
+### [unwrap (-shrc)](/home/-shrc#L162)
+
+join paragraphs into one line each.
+
+### [double (-shrc)](/home/-shrc#L163)
+
+print every line twice. <br/> print every line twice.
+
+### [join2 (-shrc)](/home/-shrc#L164)
+
+join every other line.
+
+### [katagana (-shrc)](/home/-shrc#L165)
+
+convert katakana codepoints to their equivalent hiragana.
+useful for translating [debug text from ancient games.](https://tcrf.net/)
+
+### [picky (-shrc)](/home/-shrc#L167)
+
+TODO
+
+### [unused (-shrc)](/home/-shrc#L168)
+
+TODO
+
+### [makepkgf (-shrc)](/home/-shrc#L169)
+
+make the freakin' package!
+
+### [rakef (-shrc)](/home/-shrc#L170)
+
+make the freakin' gem!
+
+### [eashare (-shrc)](/home/-shrc#L172)
+
+upload a file and copy its URL to the clipboard.
+
+**NOTE:** this only works on MSYS2 for now.
+
+**NOTE:** i lied, this doesn't work at all.